Over the years, my imagination has grown to an almost obscene level. Weird, odd, strange, dark, funny, too smart by half, writing that defies categorisation. As a result, I have packaged a number of them together in an eBook format and hope to calm the world with their content. Big boy hopes of course, but I feel I need to try.
While they sail the internet, there’s still plenty here to distract you from the woes of modern life. Here’s a sample to wet your whistle.
It’s a marvellous thing this thing. What is the thing that’s such a mystery and so sparklingly marvellous? It’s the intangible, completely out of reach mind of the slightly verbose idiot who’s typing this drivel into his lovely iMac. You’d might wonder why I even try to describe the idiocy or the fog that dominates my mind. Well, I’m not going to. I’m going off into another weird tack and changing as the wind changes.
Look out, the wind’s changed … there was a little brown and white bunny called Jasper. He sat most days just nibbling whatever was close enough to nibble inside his little rabbit run. His friend Herbert just sat doing the same. The run was moved about the backyard with such regularity that Jasper knew which part of the yard he’d be pooping on next, and as a consequence, which pooped on grass he’d be nibbling.
Herbert had only recently arrived in the run, and he was a bit nervous. Jasper had tried to make him feel welcome, but that act of kindness had no reproductive value, and really, it wasn’t Herbert’s idea of a good thing. Jasper, on the other hand, thought any of that welcoming obligation was. He applied it to anything that came near him.
Bee loved her rabbits; she secretly loved Jasper the best and was very pleased when her uncle Peter came over and gave her another rabbit. She called it Herbert because that was the name of the smelly old man who delivered the newspaper every morning. He was nice, but he did smell, and Herbert smelt just the same. Bee’s uncle did as well sometimes, but when Bee’s Daddy did, he only did for a very short time.
Bee’s Mummy never smelt bad, she was a fresh, warm and lovely young Mummy and didn’t join Daddy or uncle Peter in the shed when they hid in there on some weekends. They even had that smelly old Herbert in there sometimes. Bee didn’t know what they did in there but she did know they smelt bad when they came out. Bee loved to talk to Jasper and Herbert and loved to pat them when they stood still. more…
