Short Stories, Rants and Observations

Alan Crawford is the author of these short stories and you can find them here and here while the wild rants, lists and observations are found in other. A small number of inquisitive people, (namely one), asked how or where the ideas come from. There’s no clear answer. When the trousers, mind or weather conditions suit, the computer opens a blank page and so it starts to flow. While each short story may swim within unpleasant situations, all of the tasty morsels including the rants, lists and observations are aimed at a mature audience.

Sadly they may seem to be rather immature at times. Although some of the writings are based on reasonably true events, the rest emerge from a ludicrous imagination and not from a serial killer. Samples can be accessed via the carousel in the side bar and the Where you Bin excerpt below.

Three Short Stories by Alan Crawford

These short stories below have been formatted into an incredibly handy and affordable eBook. They are somewhat adult in nature, with gruesome goings on, food safety and some naughty business. Available from Apple Books – Smashwords – Amazon Kindle – Barnes & Noble – Kobo

  • Bloodbath – The Gruesome Murders  a man applying a brutal approach to satisfying his needs.
  • Learning to Kill explores how a professional hitman and his family educate their son.
  • Tale of an EHO (Environmental Health Officer) food, a Church leader and adult entertainment. 

Horace was reminded of an old gag

All of his gags were old. Hey, where you bin where you wheeliebin? He was wheeling his about his garden. It was reasonably green, layered with light rain, fallen leaves, a huge number of butterflies and a hint of dog shit tickling the nostrils. These things together, although natural, flowed into one’s senses like a slow moving tide. The visual was rather calming, the flight of nature’s stained glass windows on wings was truly magnificent, while the odour, oddly tasteful.

So here I am, I’m Alan Crawford

I’ll try my best to finish the stories I’ve left in limbo and against all sensible advice and recent criticism, find time to write more. Some more short stories rants and observations for sure. The joy in doing so, far outweighs the ambivalence shown by my keen yet limited audience. I need to share my work further and grab those eyes so desperately measured by the analytic system. Above all though, please enjoy my short stories, rants and observations. The about me page presents a reasonably believable explanation of my being, while you can find me on social as @acrawfordsaid and also at