Over the years, my imagination has grown to an almost obscene level. Weird, odd, strange, dark, funny, too smart by half, writing that defies categorisation. As a result, I have packaged a number of them together in an eBook format and hope to calm the world with their content. Big boy hopes of course, but I feel I need to try.
While they sail the internet, there’s still plenty here to distract you from the woes of modern life. Here’s a sample to wet your whistle.
Bill woke to find he was old. Not very old, he thought, certainly not in his mind, not old compared to some, but old. Old enough that it seemed to deter, deflect any chance of enjoying some frolicking fun. He was physically capable, keen and prepared yet couldn’t find anyone willing to – “bonk an oldie” – “grab a grandad” – “pursue a past due date dude” or “just fuck an old fucker”. Well, technically it should be – “just not fuck an old fucker”.
He couldn’t even swing a drink or a chat. Bill now understood all too clearly that he shared this frightening realisation with women of his age. The cliche he’d heard about had boldly unfurled itself into his world and was not just flapping about in those other worlds. Men looking for younger women leaving older ladies without a market to attract or secure. Except for those with cougar abilities.
They seemed to flourish and really unfurled their flags … flying high, flapping about and really catching the wind, so to speak. The flag poles they found were proud, strong and often. Women who may not have been keen or able to swim in that category were just like Bill.
Everybody, it seemed, was having to endure flagrant, heart-piercing rejection on the current avenues open to them, via this internet dating. Such rejection was the nature of these systems. The descriptions were pretty wild as well, and Bill felt less than desirable or confident when compared to the selection criteria required by the ladies online. Bill took things far too literally, which made things all the more difficult. Oddly, the fact that the ladies were there with their own background, baggage, inadequacies and life experience didn’t seem to matter. Everyone was less than perfect, just like Bill. more…
