Short Stories, Rants and Observations

single man loose in isle 5

Reading Time: < 1 minuteWell, the time for tbaoo bachelor’ing is working to its natural conclusion, you might thing that means something else, but really it just means the bride is home in a few days. I have continued to do the right thing, so much so I’m hankering for an award. A big lush, excited type of an award. Because there’s a single man loose in isle 5.

But tonight it all changed, as I’ve just conducted my last shopping expedition “I hope” whilst looking tremendously fabulous and apparently available, my eyes were really opened while I was walking around the store on my own, with my ever so silly and somewhat fattening, ridiculous food choices, smiling intently, with a secret that wouldn’t come out.

Traditionally the supermarket is a place for male confusion, annoyance, fear, a sense of lost, embarrassment and loathing. It should not be a place for flirting, teasing, isle Olympics, helpful shopping advice or just plain bust thrusting.

I mean I’d already bought my chicken breasts, I didn’t need any more from the nubile temptress types stalking the supermarket for lonely, desperate, live males who are skulking about in the shadows, dancing on the inside to the top ten hits playing on the pa system.

Attention shoppers there’s an apparently single man loose in isle 5, go get him. He has breasts but wants a packet of instant sexual gratification, marked down for tonight only. What do they mean instant, I have a problem but it’s not that instant.

If for some sad unbelievable reason this doesn’t happen to you dear male reader, or you don’t look as fabulously attractive as tbaoo, here’s some trouser comforting inspiration and tips, yes tips that may be help you:

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An increasingly grumpy old fart posting rants, observations and trying to write somewhat twisted short stories for adults. All rights reserved unless otherwise credited © Alan Crawford - 2024

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Homeplug Bridge

I keep listening to the news speak about getting free online grant applications so I have been looking around for the best site to get one.:)

tbaoo

how did this incredibly relevant comment get by my screening system ?

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